Have You Ever Wanted To Disappear? And Join A Monastary, Go Out And Preach Young Addicts Straight.

so have you ever just sat around and wondered how things could be different? or what life would be like if you changed one small thing? or wondered what you would do if ever faced by some strange, unexpected event? i know that i think about these things all the time. I am constantly wasting away my day, dreaming about the future; and it isn’t always all good things either.
some examples:
what would happen if steve laprade wasn’t a creepy little fuck? would he get all the girls? would anyone still want to hit him in the face every time he opened his mouth? would he still continue to claim that he has a huge cock. im pretty sure the answer to all of those questions is no... but it would never happen, steve laprade will always be a creepy little fuck. (a serious question, will steve ever get laid, or will his only sex be with his hand, and the girl he rapes one night in a dark alley?)

what will happen if my room mate next year is the kind of girl who is in bed by 9, and insists that everything be spic and span, and proper? im worried that i will get stuck with a room mate who thinks that sex is wrong, and wont let me have any, and who wont want to be friends, and will only focus on her work, all the time. What happens if i cant have sex my freshmen year becuase my room mate pretends to not understand what a scarf on the door nob means? what if she is total bitch and freaks out on me because of every little thing? but then again, what if we become really good friends, or better yet, what if i get the single room i applied for?

what happens if i meet my prince charming this summer and we fall hopeless in love, and i have the best summer ever? i mean, its not like im not planning to have a great summer, but just think how much better a romance would be. i think it would make the summer perfect. the first summer before i run away to university, and i find what feels soul mate, it could be epic? also, is it true that sex is way better when it is with someone you are in love with, or is that just something that parents say to make kids not have sex and save them from getting herpes? i like to think that it is better when you are in love, but torchwood tells me otherwise. torchwood tells me that sex is best when you nearly strangers, and you just have a raw attraction. i dont know, they made it sound very convincing.

what would it be like if people could read your thoughts? could you even imagine how many people would be mad at you for thinking something about them. you can filter your words, but you cant filter your thoughts. like a girl walks by in a ridiculously short skirt, and you cant help but think "ughh, what a whore. didnt her mother teach her morals?" and bam! she hates you now. and really, do you blame her? i would hate someone who said that about me, and what makes thinking any different? and i for one, will admit, that my thoughts are ALWAYS hugely hypocritical. i feel as though i am not the only one who can say that truthfully, i think most people hypocrits at heart.

what would it be like to win the lottery? and not a small lottery, but the huge one! what would it be like to win the super7 after no one has won for a few weeks and it gets up to like 40 million? that would be epic. to be able to afford whatever you wanted, for yourself, and for everyone you knew. to be able to wake up and say "i think i would like to have italian for lunch", and then flying to italy for lunch. to be able to hired all of the cutest pool boys to work in your pool, which is pretty much the size of lake superior. to just be able to have everything you have ever wanted. i could afford a squillion gone with the wind dresses if i won the lottery. and i would probably get another buick, too.

i like to sit and daydream about things, once, just once, id like one of the really nice ones to come true.